Cool Ass Link

I get a shitload of links from friends all the time. Why are mine better than the ones your friends send? My friends are designers and go looking for the best shit on the web. Am I saying my friends are better than yours? Hell yes they are.

www.pumpupthemovie.com/toss.html is pretty fucking funny.

Starting the day the Tivo way

I realize I've reached an echelon of geek-dom that is still on the edge of excess, but holy shit, I can record ALL the Law & Order SVUs, and That 70's Show, and Futurama, and The Most Extreme (Animal Planet, for the boy, was the only way he'd get in the god-damn car to go to Best Buy). I can also Pause live TV, replay shit, and a whole slew of other shit I'll never use!

Now I don't watch much TV. Why then did I buy a fucking Tivo you ask? Because the TV I do watch is very specific. The fact that I can record those shows, find 30 minutes in between the family/house/job/cars/freelance, and actually sit down and watch what I want when I want just seems like the logical way to run my life. I am, after all, living in the On Demand world. Why shouldn't I be able to control the destiny of my viewing pleasure instead of the corporate giants "telling" me what to watch, when to watch. God damn it, Tivo is as American as ignoring the homeless, or leaving your dog locked in the back seat on a blazing hot day, or crack heads being Mayor.

With any luck, studies will show prolonged exposure to the gamma rays being omitted by the box will shrink your testicles to the size of Goobers and cause partial memory loss.

Brave Little Man

My wife is a fantastic writer. She doesn't do it enough. But when you run a house of chaos and deal with an over-inflated ego such as mine, time runs away from you; at a very hurried pace.

Today my son gets his 3 shots he needs to enter Kindergarten. I am taking a half day to help restrain him while my daughter most likely looks on in horror and fascination at her brother's reaction. My wife wrote an entry about it which I will quote here:

"As I open my mouth to admit the possibility of shots (I refuse to actually confirm them) he comes over to my side, takes my hand and says "Cause I know it's just little needles and won't hurt that bad." My jaw drops, he continues, "I do get scared sometimes when they want to stick the little needles in, but then the hurts over so fast and I don't even cry..."

What a kick ass little dude. He doesn't know dads picking up Star Wars Clone Wars for us to watch this afternoon. He doesn't know we're going to hang and chill till he feels up to eating whatever he wants. He's growing up, and I think that's a little difficult for mommy.

I'm just psyched I get to watch Clone Wars with the boy this afternoon and give him his first
beer, first lap dance, and first tattoo.

Will Ergonomics Save My Back

So, thanks to my work schedule and the numbness in my wrist I believe I may have finally contracted carpal tunnel syndrome. I use the word "contract" because this could have been avoided; I could have used protection to save myself the discomfort, embarrassment and humiliation I've had to suffer out in the open. I am now labeled a pansy.

Because I am so needed at my job, a specialist was brought in to evaluate my working station, the way I sit, the distance my monitor sits in relation to the outreach of my arms (?). So after it's all said and done, I am more uncomfortable now then I was when I had opened my big fucking mouth "do you REALIZE how hard you work me here? NO help, LONG hours; and I think I have carpal TUNNEL!" I figured I'd get a pat on the back, maybe a half day, but not all this crap.

So now my chair is upright, my line of sight 3/4 from the top of my monitor, my second monitor is raised on a platform to my right, and all my god damn Photoshop palates are ALL screwed up.

Isn't it time for a drink?

New Porsche Vs. Digital Hasselblad

As a professionally trained photographer (many people think I come off as arrogant when I start a sentence this way. It offends people who think that statement deems me a better photographer then they are, and such that I have a wealth of knowledge that they don't to which I shouldn't be so blatant about. Fuck that. For $100,000 [which is what my education fucking cost] and the fact that I am no LONGER a professional photographer, all that first statement says is that I am TRAINED as one) who no longer shoots very often I become lonely. I miss the chemicals, the paper, the negatives, the Polaroid's and especially the sense of accomplishment when I do shoot a great fucking image. So I'll take one of my 40 different cameras and shoot for a couple weeks, or days, or maybe I just look real hard at the camera and think about the picture I could be taking, and then I get back to my fucking digital playground. When I do get the bug it's usually for a new camera. A new digital camera because I've become a lazy slacker who likes the idea of starting out in Photoshop as opposed to cleaning a shitty scan.

$22,000 for a Digital Hasselblad. $22 fucking thousand dollars. Can you hear the conversation:

"hey babe, I know I've been talking about selling one of the kids and getting a Porsche 914, but get THIS; Hasselblad has a new Digital Camera out that uses Zeiss Optics, has a built in 40GB hard drive, and looks like the Honda Element of cameras! What do you think? Get 2? Sell BOTH kids? You're the best..."

Fuck me sideways. I need more inexpensive hobbies.